I'm on a bus and it's going fast and...

This weekend was a trip to NYC to visit my friend for her birthday and the holiday. Cheap as I am, I took the bus instead of the ridiculously-priced Amtrak. Accidentally, I ended up listening to The Lonely Island's "I'm on a boat" - and also sooo accidentally I ended up parodying it in my head. Of course that turned into typing it out painstakingly on my phone's touchscreen. And now, three days later on my return bus trip, accidentally posting it to my blog.

So, some disclaimers before I send you to the land of bus-related lyricing. Firstly, I'm sure there are typos, given my lack of touchscreen talent. Second, as it is a nearly exact copy of the original, expect profanity. There's an abundance of motherfuckers below. Just sayin'. So if you listen to the real version (or already know it), you'll pobably understand better. I'm done with warnings! Here it is in all it's tragicness.

I'm on a Bus

Aw, shit, get your luggage ready, it's about to go down. Everybody in the place hit the fuckin' line, but stay on your motherfuckin' toes. We runnin' this. Let's go.

I'm on a bus. I'm on a bus. Everybody look at me cause I'm ridin' on a bus. I'm on a bus. I'm on a bus. Take a good, hard look at the motherfuckin' bus.

I'm on a bus motherfucker take a look at me. Straight ridin' on a bus on the pavement sea. Bustin 50 mph, hair blowing in the breeze. You can't stop me motherfucker cause I'm on a bus.

Take a picture, trick. I'm on a bus, bitch. Drinkin' diet Mt Dew 'cause it's so crisp. I got no swim trunks, but got my flippy floppies. I'm eating crunchy chips; you at home straight watchin' reruns.

I'm surfin' on free wifi, sendin' emails and shit. iPhone's multitasking, letting me tweet and edit. But this ain't my apartment, this as real as it gets. I'm on a bus motherfucker, don't you ever forget.

I'm on a bus and it's goin' fast and I got a GAP-themed bus-ridin' outfit. I'm the queen of the world, on a bus like Leo. If you in a car, then you're sure not me, oh. Get the fuck up, this bus is real.

Fuck trains, I'm on a bus motherfucker. Fuck platforms, I climb stairs, motherfucker. I'm in a row with my boys motherfucker. The bus engine make noise, motherfucker.

Hey ma, if you could see me now, arms crunched in on the two-seater row. Gonna fly this bus to the moon somehow. Like Kevin Garnett anything is possible.

Yea. Never thought I'd be on a bus. It's a big black asphalt road. Yea. Construction workers, look at me, ooh. Never thought I'd see the day, when a big bus is comin' my way. Believe me when I say, I see highway mermaids.

I'm on a bus. I'm on a bus. Everybody look at me cause I'm riding on a bus. (whooa) I'm on a bus. I'm on a bus. Take a good, hard look at the motherfuckin' bus.